Tag Archives: survivors

The Top 10 Needs of Survivors of Trauma

The people in your life who have survived a major life trauma, such as childhood abuse, war, rape, domestic violence, or work place and school violence are all around us. They are called survivors because of their courage and strength. They have come through hell to be here, give them respect, love, and be a part of their support system.
Some of their basic needs that need to be in place for them to fully heal are:

1. To feel safe.
A safe place is the most important issue for all survivors. Find out from them what that looks like and feels like and provide it.

2. To have you listen with your heart
Every survivor has a story to tell. Let them speak about it. Listen gently.

3. Creative Expression Encourage their creative expression in any art form that speaks to their spirit.

4. To breathe, and to learn to relax.

Adrenaline and stress reaction and panic attacks may be deeply embedded in their psyches. Direct them to stay present, slowly breathe, and use self talk to comfort themselves.

5. Time.
They are learning new ways of coping with the life they now face. Be patient.

6. Boundaries.
They need to set clear firm boundaries around everything that is important to them.

7. To be open to build a new life with them, and help them try new experiences.
Activities with loved ones in nature or museums, or restaurants …..New environments will open a space to replace sad memories.

8. Professional Support.
Get them all the support they need. There are many support groups, and specialized counselors for trauma survivors. Do not hesitate to contact Medical or Mental Health specialists if you suspect feelings of hopelessness or suicidal tendencies.

9. Believe in them.
Respect the struggle and the effort as they find meaning and hope in their life, and you will see them transform their lives into something worthwhile and meaningful.

10. To make the world a better place.
Healing can come from helping others less fortunate. When we are reminded of our blessings as we reach to lift another person up…it eases our burdens. Speaking about our lives and our joy and our traumas can help others heal…. It can make the world a better place.

Julie Towers
Stand by Me…..


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Filed under Healing, Trauma

The Top Ten List for Finding Peace of Mind

Peace of mind does not only come to us when everything is going well. It is a combination of many areas of our life that can sustain us when life is not going well.

#1. Forgiveness.
Let go of anger toward anyone, including yourself.

#2. Reserves.
Have the awareness that you are not going to run out of the things that can cause disruption in your life, eg. gas,food,water…and even love.

#3. Acceptance of yourself and others.

The only person you can change is you. Let the past go and make better decisions for your future.

#4. Have a Clear Conscience.
Act always as though someone you respect is watching you.

#5. Support.

Know where you can turn for support or help. A shoulder to cry on, someone to listen. If you need help….ask for it.

#6. Surroundings that comfort you and bring you joy.
Keep your home tidy, organized, and attractive to you. Involve all of your senses, smell, touch, and music.

#7. Wrap up your to do lists, and catch up any over due bills.

Just making progress on this area, will bring you peace of mind. Set a schedule to complete them. Ask for help.

#8. Know that you are connected to Something….
Your family, your church, your friends, your support group…know that you do BELONG.

#9. You are not a victim.

You have a choice. Look at all of your options….they are there in front of you. Brainstorm to find them.

#10. Know that you can change the World.
One person can have an impact….so help out, volunteer, create the ripple in the pond that will affect others lives.

Let there be Peace on earth….and Let it Begin with Me.

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Filed under Healing, Honesty, Love, Peace of Mind, Virtues